Some classics movies I have seen in this regard, namely Requiem for a Dream, Trainspotting, DevD and suchlike, have conveyed the message only too lucidly for the masses to register one damn thing- Addiction kills. For numbskulls like me, a plain message doesn’t play out until it has been experienced. And though I didn’t get killed, I surely got severely screwed following the over-indulgence.
End –Semester exams- a period of frenzied conversations, nocturnal night out sessions, harried hours of cramming in infinitely boring stuff. In IIT, the LAN BAN timings are extended. From a premature 12 am they now go off at 4 am. The entire hoard of shameless wretches known as IITians would be seen online until the precise moment of epiphany wherein their Antaraatma would shriek, “Saale, thoda to padh le, nahi to kal fail ho jayega…”
Just before the Chemistry exam, I, in an act mirroring my foresightedness and preparedness, gave my Lan Cord away to Farma, knowing extremely well that I possessed no Antar-aatma. Farma was almost in tears, for he knew what the Lan Cord meant to me. He patted my head elder brother-like, and told me, “Your sacrifice shall not go in vain. Tomorrow, the Chemistry paper awaits its molestation by the Boisterous Bissu!”
I went to my room, feeling slightly elated. I was proud of myself for making a decision of this mammoth parameter. I was finally acting the responsible adult. And so pepped up, I opened my laptop, and started perusing the lecture slides.
Half an hour later, my hands of their own accord, manoeuvred the mouse pointer over to Google Chrome and double clicked, making me suspicious if I suffered from the Alien Hand Syndrome. Needless to say, an almost blank page with the words “This webpage is not available” greeted my eyes. Reminding myself that I no longer had the cord, I went back to mugging.
But it was not to be. The thought of any new comment on my status update, any new Liker of the link I had shared, any new gift someone had bestowed on me in Mafia Wars, any new comment on my blog etc. ballooned up in my mind, , making me struggle continuously against thoughts of rebellion. Half an hour later saw me in Farma’s room.
“Oye Farma, I was thinking..umm…would it be possible for you to give me the cord for just a few minutes?”
“Some urgent mails might have come.”
“Urgent mails during end-sems? And whats more urgent than exams?”
“Umm…yeah…I suppose you are right. I will go study.”
10 minutes later…
“Oye Farma, only 2 minutes man. Come on.”
“No chance buddy.”
“Its my fucking lan cord. Giveittome!”
“Then I suppose you want your nose bloodied up. Or maybe, several of your teeth bashed in. I am serious. I swear I am gonna hit you. I am gonna fuck you up.”
Here, the annals of the life of the effervescent Farma need to be opened and disclosed to the incognizant readers. This alumnus of a Sainik School, ex-NDA aspirant, player of myriad sports, volleyball Inter-IITian, body not unlike a hunk, looked me calmly in the eye before saying,
“I would love to see you try.”
I gulped, watered my dry lips, before I made any move.
“Farma, you know what, I think you have my best interests in your mind. I think I should really go study now.”
“Good for you.”
20 minutes later…
“Yaar Farma, only 2 minutes yaar…”
“Hey, you know what? I am gonna do it in front of you, all right? Right here where you can keep an eye on me and wrestle the cord from my grasp once the deadline’s over.”
“Please yaar, 1 minute man…”
“Listen, I am doing this for your own good. The paper tomorrow is touted to be one the toughest ones in all our exams. A few more hours of mugging and then you can browse for all eternity man. Just stay put. Everything’s gonna be ok.” He put his hand on my shoulder and patted me. I shrugged it off and went away.
I came back a few minutes later.
“Farma, I have realised my folly. I shall beg you no more. I will go and study with perseverance hitherto unseen elsewhere. My concentration from now on will be the talk of the town…sorry…insti. Thanks buddy, for showing me the right path. I am indeed blessed to have bros like you.”
“I am so proud to hear tha-“ here his voice choked, as he came close to tears for the second time that day, “that…All right, now off you go and study. We are gonna rock this paper!”
2 hours later…
I opened the door in response to the knocking earlier. Farma stood there, grinning ear to ear.
“Kitta mug liya?”
“Well, been through 3 lecture slides, midway through fourth. Will go through the tutorial later.”
“Awesome man. That’s some speed! Good good, keep mugging.”
“Sure man. I will come to your room once the 4th one’s done.”
“Sure. I will be waiting.”
I closed the door behind him as discretely as I could. Even though there was no one, my heart throbbed with a premonition of the unknown. I tiptoed to my bed, and giving a furtive glance around the room, took out the lan cord of my roomie which had been hastily shoved inside the pillow case a moment earlier…
I got raped the following day. Ohh wait, I already have mentioned that, haven’t I?